Day 69: Head to Ho Chi Minh

Awake at 10, hit the showers, oh crap, my towel is going to be wet for the whole bus ride if packed in it's current condition. Make a b-line for the edge of the back decks, it's already in the 90's, solid breeze, I think I've found my dryer. Order breakfast, deliver it to my spot, eat, blog a bit, and presto, 45 minutes later and the towel is dry.

It's time to leave, settle my bill, get back my passport, follow a man down the alley to a minibus. I sit in the front seat per my usual custom, realize all aircon vents are pointed on me. As more people are gathered and loaded up from their respective guesthouses, another minibus guy appears ... Oh, I bet this is his seat, he was going to have all the aircon on himself, rat bastard ... Or should I say sucka!

Make it to the main bus station, my ticket has an actual seat assigned to it. Take my seat, 2 seconds later I see a local woman walking down the isle with a 2 year old in her arms, and we all know what that means ... 1 seat, 2 occupants, 3 times the luggage. It's like seeing a large sweaty smelly man walking down the isle of an airplane, you cross your fingers, say a little prayer, and then praise when he walks by. As she approaches, I do the drill ... God has a sense of humor, they're my new neighbors for the next 6 hours. Better yet, the bus is only half full, but from what I observe, the unwritten rule, locals are not allowed to switch seats. Her English is surprisingly good, enjoy some light conversation about her jobs, husband, child.

3 hours later, I figure out the seat switching rule does not apply to me, move towards the back of the bus, take two seats, spread out. The bus stops, uh oh, am I in trouble? Wait, we are at what looks like a port, bus doors open, a white person exits. Am I next? Bus begins to move straight towards the river ... Uh, anyone else noticing this? After a few bumps, bus stops, look out the window, we're floating over the water. What? It's a ferry.

Did I mention that this bus comes equipped with state of the art electronics? A huge 21" tube tv mounted on custom brackets, DVD player, and surround sound playing digital Dolby out of the one boom box speaker they stole off some rollerskating hippy in the 90's. They had previously shown a Vietnamese movie or tv show or who knows what it was. But now, they just inserted the Die Another Day Dvd, woo hoo! Opening scene, can barely hear anything. Hey, can you turn it up? Volume goes up. James Bond makes a comment, still hard to hear, and there it is ... A loud monotone female Vietnamese voice. She does James Bond, she does the Asians, she does the women, she does everyone. Better than that, they have Vietnamese subtitles on the bottom, so you can't read it, can't hear it, can't understand it - guess it's nap time.

Ho Chi Minh! We've made it, dropped off park side on a busy street, all the accommodations and restaurants are across the street. My first "crossing the street" experience with the Vietnam motorcross mayhem! Remember the game Frogger, where you are a little green frog trying to get across a busy road? I jump forward, jump back, then forward again, freeze, run! Made it! One piece, no accidents, bag and body in tact, even brought a few Canadians along for the ride.

Search for a hostel someone gave me the name of, apparently a few months ago it became a bank. Told there are no hostels, so I find a room with aircon, hot water, good pressure, satellite tv, minifridge, $11, not terribly expensive, only catch, 5th floor of a walkup. I could use the exercise.

Grab grub, head back to Ly Ly's Guesthouse, hit up the lonely planet, locate a few places to chill at night, head out the door. Advantage to staying in the Backpackers district beyond the cheap accommodations and the choice cheap food, there are a fair selection of bars around, to venture there would make sense. But lonely planet suggested a few other joints about a km towards the swanky part of town, so off I go. Cross the main street again, my records 2-0, walk alongside the park, tons of locals around, nice night and then ...

She pulls up on a motorbike. "I gee ewe massa, happy end, boom boom, $10." I'm sorry, what was that? "I gee ewwww massa, happy end, boom boom, $10, I room." Oh, uh, no thanks. "Mista mista, it no problem, own lee ten dolla. Eww com wi me." Shaking my head vigorously, Thanks anyhow but no. Stop and start walking opposite direction. Approached by another pair of girls on a bike. Leave me alone. I don't want any. And is that an adam's apple? Quickly cross back to the other side of the street, they leave me alone.

Later find out, that's the lady boy prostitution hot spot. A patch of grass dividing traffic in the middle of the city.

Finally find the bars down by the swank hotels, not impressed, head back to Ly Ly's and call it a night.

Nite nite Blogosphere - iPhone Blogger out!